Thursday, April 9, 2009
Male A has always been a model for me since young. He's the one whom taught me before giving judgment on people, judge yourself first. Female A+ taught Male A about this and then to me. I was a prefect during my primary school, a sheriff during secondary school; thanks to his words which sometimes quite harsh and cold. But, these made me a better person.
Something's now affecting my judgment on Male A. He did something out of the extraordinary which I cannot accept till now. I rather trust him than to doubt him. I'm unable to do something secretive and to prove I'm right that the things he done was wrong. I find myself disgusted if I did that.
One thing I've come to terms is that if he really did something that I judged if unforgivable, I will do what is suppose to do though by doing this I felt guilt ridden towards female A. Hai, sometimes to think of it will I find my other half somehow has the characteristics of female A?
I've been avoiding my friends and my kaki's nowadays. I don't have the heart to dilly dally somewhere; where I myself always encountered problems with friends.
I don't do well with friends, nothing goes well when I try to find the other half, nothing goes well in clinging to blood relations.
Signed off
Alvin Soh
Age : 20
Family